THE CARNAGE! My house is an abattoir!

I’m pretty sure I’m gonna puke!

Ewwwww!!!!

So here’s my little tale.

Now that the house is finally coming together, the hubby and I occasionally have some friends over. They’d just gotten in the door and were standing in the living room when they noticed my Christmas window gels still up in the window. Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s July and I still have some Christmas stuff up. I’m a maniac! ;)

Anyway, the gels are these gummy-like decals you stick to the window. They feel like a wet, smushed, slightly melted gummy bear, but they stick great and last a long time. Well, until the evil summer heat of Arizona gets at ‘em.

The snowman couple on the right had held up pretty well, but the cute little penguins on the left had met a rather unfortunate, melty fate. It was actually kinda gross looking. Like the face melting scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

We were all standing about 10 feet away and commenting on the sorry state of my little gel friends and their accompanying snowflakes when I noticed that some of the snowflakes had turned black.

My first thought was, “Wow, that’s probably unhealthy. If the sun baked what used to be white, lavender and baby blue snowflakes into black, crusty nightmares then the fumes it put off while cooking can’t have been healthy to breathe.”

So I walked over to them to scrape them off the window and much to my horror…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The carnage! Death abounded! The slow, painful murder of dozens of small critters faced me in my once-loved gummy snowflakes.

Look below at your own risk!

 

 

OH THE CARNAGE!

 

Here it is a little closer up if ya really wanna see mass death!

Fly Death!

Holy fuck that is nasty!

I had NO idea I was murdering flies in such a gruesome way!

And the poor little buggers were left on display and I didn’t even notice. They had a public burial. Total ewww!!

So yeah, I screamed. Then said to the hubby, “Can you please remove the hideous death trap that our sweet Christmas decorations have become?”

I don’t know what they make the gummy decals with (crack? meth? chocolate?) that would be so alluring to flies. Especially since the snowmen were of absolutely no interest to them at all. Completely bizarre.

When I went to look at the snowmen the other day (which are still there to this day…yeah, again…I know…) I noticed a leftover fly leg stuck to the window. Poor little critters. I may not like flies, but nothing deserves to be cooked at 150 degrees while stuck in goo on an Arizona window.

Well, there you have it. I’m now officially horrified. I’m a murderer, pure and simple. Off with my head! ;)

R.I.P. sweet little hamster

 

Well, dammit.

Less than 24 hours ago I was counting my blessings, including the fact that my old ass hamster was still amongst the living. Little did I know he only had 8 hours of life left.

I love you Hamster. Mommy and Daddy miss you tremendously. There will never be a fuzzy-butted little hamster anywhere near as wonderful and sweet as you.

Little Hamster’s first day with his new family. SWAK!

Daddy, after a hard day’s work, playing with the little guy. He loved little Hamster too.

Our sweet little baby his first night in his new home.

 

Perspective from a Formerly Dead Person

What a title, right? I have a lot of people ask me how I’ve learned to find such peace and contentment in my life. Like everyone else, I deal with struggles, hardship, and loss. But even through all of that, I usually find a way to come to terms with it all and move forward in a positive way. That doesn’t mean I don’t wanna smash my computer with a bat when it doesn’t work right. Or that I don’t want to drive into my office and ring necks when people get on my nerves. It doesn’t mean that if anything ever happened to my husband that I wouldn’t want to crawl into a hole and die. But, for the most part, I’m able to roll with the punches and keep my chin up (wow, 2 cliches in one sentence! That’s a record!).

I think one of the reasons for that is that I’ve been dead twice. Yeppers, you read that correctly. Once when I was just a very small child and again in my early 20s. I believe with all my heart that God jump started my heart both times so that I could live a bit longer.

How these death experiences have helped me is two-fold:

  • I had no fear when I died. None. I believe in heaven and both while dying (though I don’t really remember it the first time) and upon coming back, I never felt fear. I felt peace.
  • I realized that life can be gone in the blink of an eye, so I knew I’d have to make it count while I was here.

Having those two understandings helps me in so many ways. I don’t worry so much about the little things anymore. I don’t try and control everything. I never try to control other people. I know that eventually, all things work out as they should. I’m okay with who I am. I know that I don’t have to the prettiest, smartest, funniest girl on earth to be happy. I’m almost 42 and I don’t worry that I don’t look like I did when I was 20. I find growing old gracefully to be a blessing and a huge stress relief.

Ultimately, I learned and live my life’s mantra because of these experiences: Wake up. Be kind. Go to bed. Repeat.

While I hope none of you have to go through the physical struggles I’ve been through, I do very much wish that all of you find peace and contentment in your lives. When you have those 2 things, everything else comes naturally.

Blessings to all of you!

PS: If any of you out there have experienced something similar, I’d love you to share that story here so we can all benefit from what you went through.