Jun 5 2012

Musings Of An Old Hag On Her Birthday

So, today I’m 42. Yep. 4. 2. How is that possible? Am I not still 16? 23? 31? I feel like I’m young. And really, it’s not like 42 is knocking on Death’s door. But it’s not 20–THANK GOD.

The great thing about my happy day is that I wouldn’t go back to being 20 for all the otters in Otterland. I mean that sincerely.

Here’s me at 20:

Here’s how I felt about everything:

  • Scared
  • Insecure
  • Worried
  • Unsure about who I should be
  • Unsure about who I was at the moment
  • People pleasing was a full-time job
  • Thought I had to be perfect all the time
  • Wanted everyone to like me

Here’s me at 42 (okay, 41 and 7 months as Christmas isn’t today):

Here’s how I feel about everything now:

  • At peace
  • Happy
  • Contented
  • Secure
  • Confident
  • Strong
  • Hopeful
  • Self-aware
  • Okay about aging gracefully
  • People pleasing is only a very small hobby
  • I don’t want to be perfect even 25% of the time
  • I prefer it when people like me (as I kick ass! šŸ˜‰ KIDDING!), but no longer let it bother me if they don’t

Man, that makes it seem like I’ve got everything figured out. I don’t. But I have a lot more figured out now than I did when I was 20.

Here are the things I’ve learned over the years:

  • I like who I am.
  • What other people think isn’t the most important thing in my life (it’s way down the list.)
  • I surround myself only with people that I love (or at least like a lot.)
  • I rarely allow myself to be pressured into anything (been there, done that.)
  • I am kind in every instance possible and still not mean even when provoked (though I can be QUITE firm when necessary.) šŸ™‚
  • Too much pride and ego get you nowhere.
  • Judging other people because they have different beliefs is ridiculous. What is right for me may not be right for them, and that’s okay.
  • I’m introverted–yes, it’s true. I’m an INFJ for those of you who know what Myers Briggs is. Shocking, I know.
  • I don’t like any form of housework (as you all well know!)
  • I let people take care of me sometimes–I don’t have to be superwoman 100% of the time.
  • I regret nothing, even the screwed up crap that about killed me at the time. It doesn’t change anything and all roads led me to here.

The difference between 20 and 42 isn’t just 22 years, it’s a lifetime. I am so very thankful for all the wonderful people and things in my life. My husband, family and friends are so very dear to me. I am also very thankful for my new blogging family. I am stunned beyond measure just how many of you wonderful people I interact with daily and I’m so very happy I met you guys! Have a very blessed day and life!

151 comments on “Musings Of An Old Hag On Her Birthday”

  1. Happy birthday Jodie, I hope you have a really good day.

    Don’t worry, I’m 45 this year. I did a post a couple of weeks ago, that referred to one I did eight years ago. May be an idea for you to do something similar for your readers.

    “If you were to meet yourself from a decade ago, would you recognise yourself? Would you have anything in common? Would you get on, or would you find yourself irritated with your naivety? Would you tell yourself to do anything differently or do you accept everything that has happened between then and now as necessary on the path to who you are now and who you are to become”

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  4. Happy birthday! I honestly think about high school days all the time and wonder if I’ll enjoy reliving those days again, but I guess I do like my life the way it is now. Most of the time anyway!

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  6. Happy Birthday! I am 29 years old and I am about to hit 30! This blog post just gave me an idea to explore how far I’ve come and to embrace what the future holds for me as well.

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  9. Only a few years behind ya and half yur @20 list still applies .. lol

    Would like to say it means I’m young at heart but really, I just refuse to grow up

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  12. Great post! Happy Birthday! I feel the same as you and might I add , I will turn 52 in August and it keeps getting better! You have a lot to look forward to!

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  13. Happy Birthday!!! We used to live in a tribal culture where age was revered, implying wisdom – there is nothing particularly great about being young (especially when you still look 20 anyway xx).

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  14. Happy birthday Jodi! Seems that being a little older makes you a lot wiser! Since you mentioned Briggs, I’m an ENFP if that tells you anything šŸ˜‰ Have a great day and all the best in your 42nd year!

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  19. Happy birthday, Jodi. Here you are being all smart and wise again, and on top of that, holy crap, you were and are a pretty lady. (Can I say that?) Post this every week or so, would you? Great reminders.

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  21. You look beautiful for your age. I’m 34 and I still catch myself worrying about what others will think sometimes, I’m getting better at it though and I’m so much better than my 20 yr old self. Happy Birthday!

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    • Sis…thank you!!! You are too kind. šŸ™‚ With every passing year your, “Give a shit meter” will decrease. By the time you are my age, VERY little is annoying because you just don’t care anymore. It’s BLISS!! šŸ™‚

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  22. Happy Birthday, Jodi! Hope you have a lovely day! šŸ˜€ I hope my “42 birthday post” (in about 20 years!) will be as insightful to youngish people … šŸ™‚ Never stop learning, eh!

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  30. Read something to the tune of:
    Your 20s are for looking good
    Your 30s are for learning lessons
    Your 40s are for teaching lessons
    Your 50s are for leading leaders
    IDK really, but these sound good. The point was Shut the hell up when you’re 20!
    Feliz cumpleano a ti.
    ~Regards, Dan

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  31. Wait … you just described me!! We are the same person (except I’m about 8 years older than you … bleh!) I remember hearing one time someone saying 40 and up is the best time of life. I have to agree! You mellow out … and, quite frankly, you just don’t give a damn about all the DRAMA!!! And you appreciate life SOOOO much more! SO … HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! I hope you have a great day and a great year … and by the way … you look amazing!! šŸ˜€

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    • You are SO NOT 8 years older than me!! You look BEAUTIFUL and so YOUNG!!! šŸ™‚ Good genetics on you, pretty lady!! šŸ™‚ I agree so much with you–my 40s have been the best years of my life, and only getting better. I love not giving a rat’s ass about so much that used to drive me bonkers. FREEDOM!! šŸ™‚ Thank you for the sweetness and the birthday wishes. You are always a ray of sunshine in my life. šŸ™‚ XOXOXO

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  32. Happy Birthday to our special hooman friend Miss Jodi! On a strange coincidence Bingo and Buddy are celebrating being six months old today. A special half year mark for them! šŸ™‚

    Piggy kisses

    Nibbles, Nutty, Bingo & Buddy
    xxxx

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    • Please give Bingo and Buddy a big ole Happy 6 months birthday kiss from me!!! I love their furry noggins!! And thanks to all the critter and Mummy for a lovely birthday wish. Much love to all of you!!!

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  38. Happy Birthday & congratulations on wearing it so well. When I was younger I always wanted to be older, and now in my mid forties I can see that was about the old thing I wasn’t young & stupid about, aahh but that too – I didn’t want to be older for all the reasons I like being older – same as your’s pretty much – I just thought the world & I would be perfect if only, but it wasn’t & isn’t thank God.

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  42. I hope your birthday was super, wonderful, and fantastic. I think there is nothing better than looking back and realizing how much you have learned, how much you have grown. Even better is when you look back with no regrets, because there is silver lining to every misfortune and those who can always find it are truly blessed. Good for you! You really do KICK ASS!

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    • Thank you! It was wonderful from start to finish. šŸ™‚ And I’m so glad you like the post. šŸ™‚ It is amazing to be able to look back on your life with clarity and see how many changes have happened for the better. I’m thankful for my life every day. Thanks so much for dropping by!

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  45. Great post:) I am turning shhh…(39) this summer. You have made me feel a bit better about it. I agree, I am enjoying these years so much better than my 20’s. The girl back then was a crazy people-pleaser as well. I am an INTJ, so I imagine we have some things in common;) Thanks for following my blog, as it led me to yours!

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    • I promise, I won’t tell anyone about 39 lurking around the corner. BAD 39!! I’m going to smack its hand! šŸ˜‰ I’m glad the post made you feel a little better. As you are an INTJ, I bet we DO have a lot in common. Have yourself a great night! šŸ™‚ Hugs!

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  46. Happy birthday Jodi,
    4 and 2 is not big number…:D
    the most things I like about what you learned is. “What other people think isnā€™t the most important…”
    and me too don’t like to do housework, but sadly I still have to do it

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    • Thanks for saying 4.2. isn’t old. I don’t FEEL old, dangit!! šŸ™‚ Sorry you have to still do housework. I still do a little too, but as LITTLE as humanly possible!! šŸ˜‰ Have a great night!

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  47. Happy Birthday! 42 is not old, I should know. I was made fun of all through school because my mom had me when she was 39 so old does not exist. Visit me again soon! It gves me something to do! Happy Reading!

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    • Thank you!!! I don’t feel old–except when my alarm goes off in the morning, but I’ve ALWAYS hated that!!! šŸ™‚ My mom had me in her 30s. I think it’s great when people wait until they are older. All that wisdom I can only imagine helps with child rearing. Have a wonderful day and thanks for dropping by!

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  48. HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Love this post! Like you, I wouldn’t take 20 over 40 for all the beans in the world. I’m not sure what beans has to do with it, but I’m jet lagged and couldn’t think of any other saying. šŸ™‚ Have a GREAt day. Cheers!

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    • Hi De!! Thank you!!! I’m so happy you liked the post!!! You like beans. I went with otters. Neither one of us makes sense. At least you have jet lag as an excuse!! šŸ˜‰ Hee hee hee… 40 is so much better, isn’t it?? šŸ™‚ You have a good one too!

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    • Hi Coming East! My pleasure following you blog. And thanks for enjoying the post. I’m so glad you liked it. I tell ya, it’s been a HARD 22 years (42, really) and all that hard stuff helps you learn the good stuff–no doubt!!!

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  50. A little belated but, Happy Birthday! I must say, you look amazing for 42! Really. I’m not just sucking up because you stopped by my little blog and decided to follow it for a little while. (Thanks btw.) šŸ™‚

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  52. Hope you had a wonderful birthday Jodi !!
    I really enjoyed this post, I have to agree with you that I wouldn’t want to go back for anything. I was exactly the same as you at 20, I had a little chuckle to myself as I read the list as I kept ticking them off in my head, “yep, that too, a-hu, Hmmm-mmm, Oh I remember that one”… etc. I haven’t quite got to be able to mark off all of your list at 42 yet, although there are many I can tick and others that I know I am closer to. I have 7 years to catch you. Lol… Thanks so much for sharing your journey to find peace with yourself. I am greatly encouraged by this! Cheers

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    • Hi Water Bearer!!! What a LOVELY comment!! You just warmed my heart. šŸ™‚

      I did have an amazing birthday and I’m so very pleased that you enjoyed my post. Ugh, 20. NEVER AGAIN! (Thank God!) As you still have 7 years to catch up to me, I’d say you are doing pretty dang great. I didn’t “come into my own” until my mid-30s. It took that much time to finally have the ever-desirable epiphany.

      Have a wonderful weekend and thank you so much for dropping by. It’s great to meet new friends. šŸ™‚

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      • Thanks for such a kind compliment! I am glad you had a fabulous birthday. I think I must have been having epiphanies for over ten years now and I wonder how many more there are to come!?! I do love that feeling of reaching a new level of self-awareness. It is what I based my blog on afterall, self-awarness and refreshing faith!! :o) So hard to imagine going through life without either, šŸ˜¦
        A new friend is a wonderful thing indeed, especially one as encouraging as yourself. I feel a little more blessed for it. Thanks muchly!! šŸ™‚

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  53. Oh Jodi please take out that smiley face next to “life without either….” it was suppose to be a frown or a sideward mouth, Im sure you know what mean lol Silly computer doesnt get my emotiocons haha, cheers šŸ™‚

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    • Seriously, you are so funny!!! I would have done just like you and left another comment to fix a typo or mis-matched smiley face!! šŸ™‚ I love that your blog is about self-awareness and refreshing faith. Those are two of the most amazing things a person can have in life. One of the things my hubby and I love so much about each other is that we are very self-aware. We both thought we were when we were young, but oh were we wrong!! Now we really do have a wonderful clarity and it makes life so much easier. Having an abiding faith is another beautiful part of my life. I’m so blessed that my mom raised me to have such a deep spirituality–get’s me through the tough times. šŸ™‚

      I’m so glad we met. šŸ™‚ Have a great Saturday!

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      • Laughs* Thanks for that šŸ™‚ I too thought I was self-aware at a young age, and was also very wrong. My dear departed Dad was the one to teach me strong faith able to withstand the trials of life. Life is now good, and blessed! I read two things this morning that I just had to share, I wrote them in my journal in April this year:
        1. The pride of our hearts will deceive us.
        2. 2012 can be your best year or your worst, the choice is yours.
        I now look back and read them, grateful that I chose to make changes to try for the best. It has truly been the best year since I began publishing my blogs. A new friend is one of the reasons why. šŸ™‚

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      • You are very blessed to have had such a wonderful dad. I feel like that about my mom. She raised one strong, independent, faith-filled girl and I’ll always be thankful to her for it. šŸ™‚ Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts too. Pride is a killer!!! When I see overly prideful behavior I just feel so sorry for the person–to let something so silly get in the way of happiness is tragic. I also agree about choosing how one’s year will turn out. Life happens and some things are unavoidable, but a great attitude always helps. šŸ™‚

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  54. Wow! It feels like you read my mind. The only thing I miss about my 20’s is the amount of energy I had, but other than that I would not want to be 20 again. What a confused individual I was:)

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  55. I love the way you think…and write! Belated birthday wishes. I hit the big 6.5. this year and shared some of the things I was thinking about that day (http://suzysomethingthinksoutloud.com/2012/04/28/) I’ve been 65 for over a month now, if anything has changed it’s that I am a lot less concerned about the thoughts that I write in my blogs (yes, plural…it’s addictive, as I’m sure you know!) I hope you have a wonderful year and look forward to your future posts.

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    • Hi Suzy! You are so sweet!!! Thank you. šŸ™‚ I’m so glad you like my nutty blog. 65 eh? I can’t wait to read your post. It’ll be great getting an even better perspective on how age makes us SMART DAMMIT! šŸ˜‰ I gotta tell you, I don’t know how you manage more than one blog. I’d lose what is left of my mind. šŸ™‚ Thanks for stopping by. I’m so glad we are new blog buddies. šŸ™‚

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  57. Pingback: Who is really in the mirror? « Inner Angels & Enemies

      • Awww Thanks for your kind words, I am glad you liked my writing. This is all so new to me, I have never showed my writing to others before I began blogging and to be honest I have no idea if I am any good. God’s gifts are easily misunderstood so I just obey and see what happens. I just am so glad to have had people comment and encourage me, and some even get something good from what ‘little ole’ me’ has to say. Thanks again for everything! šŸ™‚

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      • You are very welcome!! Blogging is new to me too. I’ve only been doing it for 3 months and had NO idea where to start, what was “appropriate” (obviously, I threw that concept out the window!), or anything else related to blogging, so I know what you mean when you say it’s nice to get feedback from people who read your stuff. It feels good and is so encouraging. šŸ™‚ Keep up the great writing!

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  59. Pingback: Musings of an Old Hag on her Birthday, part deux | Jodi Ambrose's Blog

  60. First of all, happy birthday! A little bit late but with all the good intention and admiration šŸ˜‰
    Second, I loved this article because it is nice when a gorgeous lady like you accept and thank for all the good things that come with time.
    Finally, as a proud member of “forty-something” society, I agree when you imply there’s no use trying to avoid the fact you’re this age, but as long as deep inside you see yourself half your age, there’s nothing that put you down. I tip my hat off to you for having such a successful life, a loving husband and being a living example on how to “accumulate life experience” gracefully.
    Be well!

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    • Hi doll! What a sweet comment. šŸ™‚ You just made my day. I have to admit, I’m truly a blessed person and I’m thankful everyday for what I have. And I’m pretty sure I’ll always see myself as 20. I can’t help it. I am now and will always be a wild doofus! šŸ˜‰ HUGS!

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