Jun 17 2012

Father’s Day Love for a Daddy who Lives in Heaven

Dear Daddy,

I miss you. You’ve been gone almost 32 years now, so you’d think I’d be used to it. But some days, I just really miss having a daddy around.

I want you to know that I love you. It wasn’t always easy being your daughter. There were times it was downright hard. But there were also times that were joyful and wondrous. I remember how Becky and I would run up to you and maul you when you’d get home from work. Sometimes we’d hide in the kitchen to try and scare you to death when you walked in the door. BOO! How sweet that you indulged us.

I remember how you’d bring us home surprises. Just little treats to make us smile. You know I now ask the hubby (though sometimes he just does it on his own) to bring me home a surprise. It reminds me so much of you.

I remember taking Daddy Foot Rides where you’d let me sit on your big foot, wrap my arms around your leg, and you’d drag me all over the house.

I remember being so proud of you when you stopped drinking.

I remember how much happier everything became when you were baptized.

I remember how awful it was to get the news you’d been shot in the head.

I remember how horrible it was to watch you live on a ventilator for 3 days.

I remember how kind the nurses were; how loving their hands were.

I remember knowing that one day I’d see you again in Heaven.

Over the years, I’ve often not done naughty things (think sex, drugs and rock-n-roll) because I knew you were up there, looking down on me. I wanted you to be proud.

Over the years, I’ve missed having my big strong Daddy there to cry on, laugh with and be escorted down the aisle by.

Over the years, I’ve become a strong, proud, independent woman because being your daughter helped me see how important that is.

Over the years, I’ve discovered that I am like you in so many ways. Mom says I get my love of muscle cars, fast driving and cussing from you. I love that.

If you had lived I have no doubt that I’d still be a virgin wearing baggy turtlenecks and skirts down to my ankles everyday, as no boy would ever have been good enough and you’d have scared the life out of any man that tried. I’m sure that even up in Heaven you were chagrined when I married the exact man you told me to stay away from. “Don’t bring any of those long-haired hippies home!” Well, I married two of them. A girl’s gotta rebel a little. I know you’d love my sweet hubby though, Daddy. He treats me like a princess. You’d be proud to call him, “Son.”

I miss you Daddy. While I’m not looking to go to Heaven any time in the near future, I sure hope it’s you who greets me when that blessed day does happen. It’s been too long since I’ve seen your handsome face.

I love you. Happy Daddy’s Day.

Your little girl, always…

99 comments on “Father’s Day Love for a Daddy who Lives in Heaven”

  2. Relationships with parents are the most complicated & challenging of all. We chose each other but not in this realm, and to learn from each other – a relationship of the greatest trust. Your post is a great tribute to your dad & you. I’m sure he’s still around, alternately banging his forehead with his hand, and laughing🙂

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  5. That really made me cry. As a result of that, I sent a text to my dad telling him I loved him and how much he means to me.

    Although I don’t know you personally, I know you enough through this blog that he would be so proud of you Jodi.

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    • Now you are going to make ME cry!! DAMMIT! I managed only a few tears while writing it, now they are back.

      I’m so glad you sent your dad a text. I can only imagine how much it means to hear “I love you” from a child.

      Thank you, from my heart, for saying that my daddy would be proud of me. I hope I make him smile and chuckle with all my insanity. I was so shy when I was young I bet he’s stunned at the maniac I’ve turned out to be.

      Big hug to you, sweetie. And I hope you have a wonderful Daddy’s Day. XOXO

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      • Chuckle? His sides are probably splitting. LOL

        Just had a phone call from my dad saying he loved the texts, and the personalized card I sent him🙂

        Hope you have a good day – after you have gone to bed of course as it is nearly 2am there lol

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      • I love the thought of cracking up my dad. He was one of those “life of the party guys.” He had a great laugh.🙂

        I’m soooooo happy to hear that your daddy called you and loved your texts and cards. My heart is officially warmed.

        I think I hear my pillow calling me, but it’s going to have to wait for a little while. The hubby is out of town and the second he leaves my night owl tendencies come back full force. He’s one of those dang morning people. ICKY! So when he’s home I usually go to be early and just read for hours as he sleeps. I like it when we go to bed together, so even if he goes at 10:00, I go too. But when he’s gone, I’m up all hours!🙂 Have a wonderful Daddy’s Day, sweet man. XOXO

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      • Must be awful having that bed all to yourself. LOL. But normally snuggling up to someone, or just feeling the warmth of them beside you , I imagine, is comforting. So not having him there would be like having the bed changed and not putting sheets on or giving you different pillows. It just seems wrong.

        Hope he’s not gone long

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      • Believe it or not, I hate having the bed to myself!😉 He’s a flopper–he starts on one side of the bed and usually elbows me in the eye and is diagonal within an hour. I’m one of those wake up in the same place I fell asleep people. I rarely move. I miss him so much when he travels for business. He travels fairly often, he’s in Vegas now (poor bastard!), and it’s always torture. We’ve been together almost 5 years and I’m still like, “Nooooo!” when he has to go away. It may have taken me 10 lifetimes to find him, but it was worth the wait as he’s not only my hubby but my best friend too.🙂 He’ll be back in 4 days, thank God!🙂

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      • Of course, my dear! I’ll email you now.
        And yeah, going to Vegas much be such a bitch! Nothing to do. Nowhere to go. Luckily, I trust him with my life, so when he says, “Only one hooker a night,” I believe him.🙂 KIDDING!!!🙂

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  8. Like you, I miss my dad so much…I miss his words of wisdom and I miss the times that we get to sit down over several cups of coffee and just listen to him share stories of his own struggles in life.

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  9. This is when I find it hard to believe there is a God….when he takes someone precious from us. And then not others. A beautifully worded post. I only put a few words on my post that you visited…..thanks for liking it. Your’s is even better.

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    • You know, I truly believe that God brings people home to him when doing so will be better for them than remaining on earth. My dad had a spot on his lung when he died. I’m sure with all the smoking he did that it likely would have been lung cancer. My dad was one of those tough, manly-men and I’m sure if you’d asked him how he wanted to die, he’d have said that he’d rather get shot while on a hunting trip, doing something he loved and never seeing it coming, than die slowly in front of his family. At least that’s what my heart tells me.

      Thank you so much for the kind words about the post. It was my pleasure liking/following you. I’m glad we met.🙂

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  10. Wow. That must have taken so much to write down. Thank you for sharing your soul with us. Such powerful memories. Have a wonderful day, with only the best of memories!❤

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  12. heehee….I thought that was easy….but when you think about it……it could be either…..’piece’ can be a piece of something, like poetry or music etc. etc So you could say, ‘Say your piece’ in that context…..and then of course you ‘say your peace’ to get things off your chest…..or clear the air….LOL🙂

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    • It IS tough to pick!! You are exactly right when you list why each would work. I can’t remember which one I ended up using in the book–probably “peace” but I don’t remember at all.🙂 Thanks for your opinion. I’ve been dying to ask someone else what they think and voila, there you are!!😉

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  15. This is such a beautiful letter, so open and poignant. And the photo is wonderful too, captures such a great moment. The Daddy missing never goes away, though the memories seem to get sweeter, I think.

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    • Thank you, Lisa. You are so kind. I love that pic too. I’m the littlest baby, and it’s my sister next to me. I love how happy we all look.🙂 And I agree, the missing never goes away. Thank goodness I have 10 years of memories to draw upon. I hope your day was filled with peace and love.🙂

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  16. Jodi,

    That was a nice tribute to your father. As me…being a father of a 2 year old daughter, I would love a tribute like that. I know your father is smiling down from heaven on this blog post.

    Thanks for those words and Happy Father’s Day to all the fathers out there. Your girls do pay attention to you…even when you don’t think they do. LOL!

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    • Thank you.🙂 I have no doubt that your little girl (many, many, many) years from now would write something wonderful about you. There is something about having an amazing daddy that just brings out the sweetness in a girl.🙂

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    • Hi Gail. Daddy Day is hard, no doubt. It was my pleasure reading your story. Us daddy-remembering people have to stick together, especially on Father’s day. I hope you had peace today as well, new friend.🙂

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  25. Whee don’t have a Daddy with us either so whee shared our Mummy’s Daddy today. Whee are sorry to hear about your Daddy.

    Whee lost Nugget a few years ago and he is in heaven too. Maybe he has met your Daddy. Whee hope he has because your Daddy sounds like a wonderful person and whee like to think someone is looking after Nugget up there.

    Piggy hugs,
    Nibbles, Nutty, Bingo & Buddy
    xxxx

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    • Hello, my furry little friends. I have no doubt that my daddy is playing with Nugget right now, even as I type. I’m glad you were able to share Mummy’s daddy today.🙂 Kisses on all your furry little heads!!

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  26. Wow! I have a dad who’s around for once a year or two, so, this heartfelt piece had me “sniffing”. Somehow, I don’t know how it feels to have a dad who’s always there to protect you, fight for you, hug you, and show his love for you by being there. 🙂 In spite of being total strangers, I hope that you would believe me when I say that I’m glad that you’ve been blessed with a father who loved you and was there for you. And the much better thing is that in knowing that one day, you’re going to see him again – in heaven. God bless you, Jodi!

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    • Awww…Mama Sel, your words are so beautiful. I was truly blessed to have him for 10 years, though I wouldn’t have minded a little more time. And yes, I am also blessed that I will one day see him again. I’m so glad I believe in Heaven!🙂 God bless you too, sweet lady.

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  27. Oh I could write entire books about the adventures I’ve had with my dad. I’m blessed that he is still here and I’m glad to say that in two short weeks, he’ll be walking out of work for the last time. I’m hoping I will get to see more of my parents then because they will both be retired. Moving away from my parents was the hardest part of moving to this state.

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    • I’m a bit jealous! I wish I had more time with my dad. I’m really glad that you still have both of your parents. What a true blessing. It was hard when I moved from MD to AZ, luckily Mom moved out here about 6 months later and now she lives just down the street. We went and saw a movie today. It’s nice having her close by.🙂

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  28. Jodie I am so sorry to hear your very sad story. It brought a tear to my eye. In many ways Icould relate, having lost my Dad too. It is nice to have faith that we will be with them again one day for eternity. Sending Hugs & Blessings xo

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    • Hi Claire. Thanks so much for your kind and heartfelt words. It’s hard to lose a Daddy, as you know all too well. Isn’t it wonderful having faith that we’ll get to see them again? Hugs and blessings right back at’cha.🙂

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    • Oh my…I am so sorry. It’s horrible to lose a parent. Worse, I’m sure, to lose a child. Please know my heart goes out to you and my prayers will be with your family. It’s a blessing to know that our loved ones are in Heaven. We WILL see them again and they’ll be happy and whole and a peace.🙂

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  33. Pingback: Young Rocker With Dad – Single Image Sundays « rsmithing

  34. See, now you made me cry. I live on the opposite spectrum of this, my father beat me ( and possibly molested me) until one day when I was seven my mother came home to find he cracked me in the head so hard I was puking. They divorced, and I haven’t seen him or heard from him since. That was 30 years ago this summer. I love good dad’s.

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    • Oh, Rants…I’m so very, very sorry that it was so rough when you were a child. That is so incredibly heartbreaking. I’m so glad that your mom stepped up and got you away from him. NO child ever deserves anything like that. I wish so much that your dad hadn’t been such an abusive ass. While life with my dad wasn’t always easy, I’m happy to say I have a lot of great memories to cherish.

      I hope that you’ve found lots of other amazing love in your life that helps fill that daddy-void. Much love to you…

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  35. This is a beautiful tribute to your father. You said many things that I have often said to the darkness in the middle of the night. I lost my father 3 years ago. Father’s Day is still hard for me. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for that beautiful post.

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    • Hi Sean. Thank you for your kind words. They mean so very much. And I am so sorry that you lost your dad. 3 years is such a short amount of time when it comes to missing a daddy. It’s been over 30 for me and I still miss him.

      I hope yesterday wasn’t too hard on you. God bless and take care of yourself…

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  36. Jodi that was a beautiful post. Thank you for liking my “Father’s Day…”. I’ve poked around your blog a bit and found many interesting posts. This one, however, seems to tie it all together and really touches me.

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    • Thank you so much. I’m glad you liked it (and the other insanity on my blog.) 🙂 And you are very welcome for liking your Father’s Day post. I wanted to support people who were writing about their Father’s day.🙂

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    • Thank you so much…I hope Daddy would like it. I’m so very sorry you only got 2 years. That is brutal. Daddy’s should be wonderful and live LOOOOONG and happy lives. Dammit!

      I really appreciate it when you drop by. It’s always great seeing you here.🙂

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  38. Pingback: Young Rocker With Dad – Single Image Sundays « rsmithing

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