…about otters.
Okay, and other things too.
Every once and a while I have to do a post which doesn’t get down to brass tacks. It is not easy for me to do that. It about kills me. But I’m going to give it a go here. I’m going to put my solution to an anonymous problem here instead of ranting about the problem itself.
When I want to kill myself or others with a hammer, cheese grater, potato peeler or other hideous implement of death (for whatever reason) these are the things I think about in an attempt to keep sane:
- Otters. Yep, always at the top of my list.
- The fact that I have all 10 fingers and type pretty darn fast (though my keyboard has 2 keys which you really have to press hard on: S and Shift. Drives me CRAZY as it gives me unwarranted typos sometimes and you know how I am about my own typos!!
- I still have a wonderful mommy who loves me and has never judged me once in life (even when I used to dress like a total hooker in high school–but I was a good girl, I promise).
- I have a precious hubby who cherishes me and is kind every single day to me (no disclaimers on this one!).
- I have a wonderful sister who will listen to me bitch and whine and cuss like a truck stop whore without complaint (God bless her!)
- I have amazing blog buddies that always make me smile (especially when you cuss a lot for no reason–giggle giggle).
- I have loyal and loving friends who put up with my occasionally hibernating ass without complaint.
- I have billions of teddy bears that I have a tremendous amount of fun playing with (yeah, I bonkers…I know).
- I can always pop a sleeping pill and venture off into LaLa Land (I do NOT recommend this and am really about 98% joking…okay, 97%).
- I can go wander around Walgreens. I don’t know why I love doing this. It’s not like the stock changes. I just love to wander the aisles of Walgreens. Yep, I’m a doofus.
- Overall, I’ve had a dang good life. There has been tons of heartache and pain, but God has blessed me with the ability to bounce back, and for that I’m eternally grateful.
- I could have been born with two noses.
- And the all-time best thing my mom ever taught me: This too shall pass.
There are about 100 more items I could put on this list, but my laptop is literally sitting on my lap and is 4000 degrees and catching my muff on fire. Since I don’t want firebush, I’m going to have to stop my list at lucky 13.
HUGS!!!
Firebush! hehe… 😉
LikeLike
I have no sense of decorum. My mom should have drowned me in the river when I was but a wee child! 😉 Tee hee hee… 🙂
LikeLike
Well after that, you otter be good 😉
LikeLike
Ha! Well done, sir. Well done. 🙂
LikeLike
Difficult to think when I’m on my mobile. Hey … there again … difficult to think full stop 😉
LikeLike
No crashing your car sir. Hey, isn’t it damn late where you are? You out partying with the hotties? Maniac!! 😉
LikeLike
Hmm I got to send you an email about that. It’s 11:30pm
LikeLike
Yep, gonna need detail you naughty man!
LikeLike
Heading to Walgreens…. should I pick you up anything?
LikeLike
I’m gonna tell you what I tell the hubby, “I wanna surprise. Bring me home a surprise?” He jokes because if I ask for it, how can it be a surprise? I tell him it’s what he gets that is the surprise. It’s been everything from a pack of gum to a hamster. I make out like a bandit! 😉
LikeLike
Fair enough.
LikeLike
Firebush! Lol, we used to call a girl, oh nevermind. I can’t believe you didn’t mention yer fuckin’ awesome vacuum cleaner.
LikeLike
Did the curtains match the carpet on the girl you used to call… ??? Tee hee hee. Oh, and yes, I must give thanks for the world’s most awesome vacuum. Consider that #14! 🙂
LikeLike
In my house nothing much match except the lounge chairs nothing else really……because I have no sense of well anything……….
LikeLike
You are so funny 🙂 That’s how the hubby’s house was when I moved in. I have been steadily fixing it room by room for the last 5 years. Almost there…almost! 😉
LikeLike
Rofl! Firebush. I really need to remember that one.
LikeLike
Always glad to be of service. 🙂
LikeLike
Thinking of rodents works, right? They’re damn cute–no matter what anyone else says. I love that you play with your bears. I am guilty of making my stuffed friends talk from time-to-time. Funny, if you need to insult someone, it sounds better coming from a stuffed walrus. Although they often beat the crap out the poor little fella afterwards.
As always, you are such a funny bunny!!
LikeLike
Hell yeah! I love me some rodents!! 🙂 Hamsters, squirrels, mice…the list goes on and on. Teddies RULE!!! We make them do all kinds of wonderful (horrible and wrong) things. It’s awesome. I’m so glad you do it too! Though I’m not surprised as you RULE! 🙂 Big hug, sweetie!
LikeLike
Lol, firebrush. You’re too much Jodi.
Great list. I never thought of otters much before, but you’ve made me realize how cute they really are! 😀
LikeLike
THE FIREBUSH!!! (Said in a scary, midnight theater kind of way.) RUN!! RUN FROM THE FIREBUSH!!! 🙂
As for otters–hell yeah they are awesome! I love me some otters. Next time you are near a zoo, go watch them play. You’ll fall in love. 🙂 XO
LikeLike
Otters! I’ve never been grateful for otters, but now I will be. 🙂 And I’m grateful to you for reminding me to be grateful!
LikeLike
Otters truly kick ass. I’m hoping that God will let me have a huge vat of non-pooping otters in heaven that I can roll around with. That would be simply wonderful. 🙂 Hugs!
LikeLike
Love that image! 🙂
LikeLike
Otters are the cutest. I’m going to remember that and give it a try. Thanks Jodi
LikeLike
I tell ya…picturing frolicking otters cheers me up no matter what. Nothing on earth is cuter!! Have yourself a lovely evening!! 🙂
LikeLike
I’m REALLY far behind on reading my blogs, but this is funny! Also, I changed my username but you know who I am 😉
LikeLike
Hey there, lovely lady! 🙂 Glad to have you back! 🙂 I’d know who you are if you changed your name to “noname” and your email was noname@noname.com. 🙂 XOXO
LikeLike
Haha!! There is probably someone out there with a similar name!
LikeLike
I think if I ever go full-on bonkers, I’m going to change my name to Fuh Q. 😉
LikeLike
Bahahaha!! I love it!! By the way, I realized I never sent you my address for the other copy of the cookbook 😦 I’d forget my head if it wasn’t attached!
LikeLike
Did you send it yet?? 🙂 authorjodiambrose@gmail.com 🙂 I’ll get it in the mail this week. 🙂
I’m the same way–if I don’t write it down it doesn’t get done.
LikeLike
Lol, nope! I’ll email you tomorrow, I’m literally JUST about to post ranch red skinned mashed potatoes! Wait for it….
LikeLike
Drool…drool… that sounds soooo good!!!! Slurp!
The hubby has been cooking BBQ ribs for the last 9 hours and we’re about to dive into them. Total heaven. They simply refuse to stay on the bone! 🙂 🙂 XOXO
LikeLike
Yummy! They would totally go with these potatoes 🙂 XOXO
LikeLike