Nooooooooooo! The Beginning of the End.

Well, it’s confirmed.

I’m older than Methuselah!

And I’m able to document whenΒ my ancient-ness started to the exact day. How many people can say that?

So, there I am, putting on a little makeup before the man gets home so that I don’t rival the Crypt Keeper for ugliest freak show on earth and I see something in my eyebrow.

“What on earth is that?” I ask myself.

Then I flip the mirror around to the 10x magnification side (eeeee gawds, don’t ever do that!) and saw this monstrosity:

Eyebrow from Hell 2014What in the ever-loving hell is that?

Who ever heard of such a hideous thing?

Half luxurious black. Half Jodi-is-old-as-dirt gray.

What the fuck????????

I’m too young for this!

Oh, and add to the grayness the fact that that eyebrow hair is 300 feet long.

It looks like a 90-year-old man’s nose hair.

Hmmm…what shall I do to cheer myself up?

I’m thinking a splurge of pizza for dinner.

Yep, that’ll heal what ails me.

πŸ™‚

Hope you guys are having a good week! XO

 

 

34 comments on “Nooooooooooo! The Beginning of the End.

      • An old lady in a nursing home is wheeling up and down the halls in her wheelchair making sounds like she’s driving a car. As she’s going down the hall an old man jumps out of a room and says, “Excuse me ma’am but you were speeding. Can I see your driver’s license?” She digs around in her purse a little, pulls out a candy wrapper, and hands it to him. He looks it over, gives her a warning and sends her on her way. Up and down the halls she goes again. Again, the same old man jumps out of a room and says, “Excuse me ma’am but I saw you cross the centre line back there. Can I see your registration please?” She digs around in her purse a little, pulls out a store receipt and hands it to him. He looks it over, gives her another warning and sends her on her way. She zooms off again up and down the halls weaving all over. As she comes to the old man’s room again he jumps out. This time, he’s stark naked and has an erection! The old lady in the wheel chair looks up and says, “Oh no… not the Breathalyzer again!”

        Like

      • Oh my good Lord! That is hysterical!!! You boys will do anything for head! πŸ˜‰ Can’t blame you. I tell my hubby that if I had one of those toys attached to my body I be banging cantaloupes on a daily basis. It seems to me a cantaloupe would be awesome for banging. But what do I know? I don’t have one of those thingies. I’d probably never leave the house if I did. πŸ˜‰

        Like

    • I want you to know that my teddy has gotten SO MUCH LOVE!!!! She gets more than daily hugs and cuddles from Mommy. πŸ™‚ If you don’t mind, I’d love to do a post about her (and her wonderful maker) some time in the near future. Would that be okay? πŸ™‚ Love you!

      Like

  1. I’m sure on you it looked distinguished Jodi whereas it makes some of us look extinguished. Just think how fantastic it will be when that luxurious mane of yours gets a little snow, it’ll just be proof of your wisdom and no-one younger will be able to argue with you- Right!
    xxx Massive Hugs xxx

    Like

  2. Awww…. you poor deer! uhm… dear! tee hee! I am blessed to have blond hair therefore my WHITE ones don’t show as bad but I get those bad boys colored every 5 weeks and I will be blond til the day I die even if I have to skip a meal to buy the cheap stuff!! LOL! I found MY first gray hairs 2 weeks before I turned 30. I know! I know! Why in the hell was I looking for them?? But I did… and there they were! Both my parents were premature gray so I had no say in the matter. At least you only found one girlfriend! So I say pluck them suckers for as long as you can!! {{{HUGS}}} πŸ™‚

    Like

    • You beautiful blondies are so lucky! With my black hair I turn into an immediate skunk! I guess at least I smell good (most of the time!). πŸ˜‰

      30 is young!!! Dang parents and their dang gray hair! πŸ˜‰ My mom is 75 and barely has any, and I have her coloring, so I thought I was going to be good to go. But of course not! DAMMIT ALL TO HELL! πŸ˜‰ I’m too lazy to dye my hair too often, so I bought a hair magic marker to cover the grays when I’m turning into Pepe La Pew! πŸ˜‰ XOXOXO

      Like

  3. The day I find something like that, I’m done! It’s bad enough having to color my hair, which immediately takes 5-10 years off my face, but always feels like an epic chore.

    I dare not own a 10x mirror. There is nothing I need to see THAT badly!

    Like

    • I cursed quite loudly when I found it. NOT PLEASED!!!! πŸ˜‰ I hate coloring my hair too. Total suck. Now I’ll have to do it even more. Ugh. As for the 10x mirror, it is truly hideous. Anyone that looks in one more than once is a masochist! πŸ˜‰

      Like

  4. Hahahaha – Jodi, you make me laugh. And it’s been quite a while since I’ve been here. Let me tell you, though, if a grey hair was the end of all things I’d be long gone by now – and, hell, I’m only… well, let’s just leave it at that. Hope all is well with you.

    Oh, BTW, I finally bought your books. πŸ™‚

    Like

    • Glad to give you the giggles and very happy to see you back! πŸ™‚

      All in all, the gray hair isn’t too bad. It’s more the maintenance than the significance that’s a total pain in the ass! πŸ˜‰

      As for the books, I hope you like them! Fingers, toes, eyes and knees crossed. Wait. If I keep my knees crossed the hubby will feel neglected. I’ll keep everything else crossed that you enjoy them or at least get a few good chuckles. πŸ™‚ Hugs!

      Like

  5. I’ll bet not using real money that through all that, you still are beautiful.

    Though I probably went through a similar crisis when I found my hair was falling out, ahem thanks dad, we all don’t get any older… only “wiser.”

    Hope that comforted you at least a little. hehe. πŸ™‚

    Like

    • You are too sweet! πŸ™‚

      Ah yes, the wonders of hair loss! It seems as though nature has it out for us non-teenagers! Hair missing where it should be and growing where it shouldn’t. Add to it the lovely quality of gray, it’s a wonder we don’t all throw more of a fit as we graciously age! πŸ˜‰

      Like

What'cha think? Leave your comment here.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s